Doesn’t it feel like everyone claims they have a gifted child these days? You hear a myriad of things from friends, neighbors, and complete strangers. My child is talented and gifted. My child is in a pull out program because she’s bored in the classroom. My child is light years beyond his peers. I’ve always been of the opinion that it is better to wait for a complement to come your way than for you to initiate it. Agreed? I feel I can voice my opinion on this subject because I do indeed have a gifted child (gasp) and the stories I could tell, you wouldn’t even believe. (Like being two and being obsessed with reading all types of clocks and understanding ways to measure time.) I have learned to let folks simply observe and comment on their own. (Your son is doing things I’ve never seen done in my room before.) It’s better that way, for everyone involved.
Figuring out if your child is truly gifted or simply a hard worker can be a challenging conundrum. They have excellent vocabulary but just look at that mess they leave behind. They might produce a beautiful piece of art but struggle with reading. They may excel in the classroom and bomb out on the playground. They may be a leader whom others follow without question, but they have self-esteem issues. Who can really know for sure what’s going on inside their heads and hearts? As a population, we have difficulty agreeing on a definition of gifted. Take a look at these definitions to see what I mean.
The National Association for Gifted Children (NAGC) defines giftedness as: “Gifted individuals are those who demonstrate outstanding levels of aptitude (defined as an exceptional ability to reason and learn) or competence (documented performance or achievement in top 10% or rarer) in one or more domains. Domains include any structured area of activity with its own symbol system (e.g., mathematics, music, language) and/or set of sensorimotor skills (e.g., painting, dance, sports).”
Columbus Group defines the giftedness from another point of view: “Giftedness is asynchronous development in which advanced cognitive abilities and heightened intensity combine to create inner experiences and awareness that are qualitatively different from the norm. This asynchrony increases with higher intellectual capacity. The uniqueness of the gifted renders them particularly vulnerable and requires modifications in parenting, teaching and counseling in order for them to develop optimally.”
If those definitions were not enough, each state in the Union has its very own definition. Texas Education Code (where I live) definition is: “Gifted and talented student” means a child or youth who performs at or shows the potential for performing at a remarkably high level of accomplishment when compared to others of the same age, experience, or environment and who: (1) exhibits high performance capability in an intellectual, creative, or artistic area; (2) possesses an unusual capacity for leadership; or (3) excels in a specific academic field. (Texas Education Code 29.121)”
Maybe we should all just admit that it is hard to spot the gifted child. And that maybe, just maybe, our world is a bit too obsessed with claiming giftedness. Our goal Mom, shouldn’t be to push our kids ahead of their peers or even compare them. Instead, our job is to discover their talents and strengths that are buried inside, bring them out and let our kids shine! As Prov. 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” I believe this is referring to their unique inborn giftings at which they will naturally excel.
So, can you spot the gifted child? Sometimes yes. It’s easy to spot beautiful products or extensive vocabulary. Sometimes no. Not so easy to spot the hidden mathematical pattern in the art or the intelligent thought behind the made-up game. Don’t worry, even the “experts” sometimes miss it. But everyone has a gifting, whether it is easily spotted or not!
Do you agree that everyone has a gifting? How much happier would your child be if s/he was encouraged to develop what comes naturally to them?
Read Often, Vote Daily.